The pressures on mothers have eased in some ways, but grown in many others
A meme doing the rounds in cyberspace imagines Isaac Newton’s mother asking her son: “But did you wash the apple before eating it?” Moms will always be moms, is the light-hearted conclusion, in a tongue-in-cheek tribute to mothers at a time when they have a day dedicated to them.
The second Sunday in May, which was on the weekend, has come to be observed as Mother’s Day. The event originated in the United States, but it has spread to many countries and cultures by now. Hinduism celebrates it as Mata Tirtha Aunshi (Mother Pilgrimage Fortnight), and Islam too pays special attention to mothers. Buddhism has its festival for mothers too.
Society recognises mothers as someone special—for their unconditional love and care, sacrifice, being an emotional anchor, cultural and symbolic role, and especially their influence on shaping their children’s identities. Even in changing times, when gender roles have drastically changed, mothers often prioritise their children’s needs above their own—from pregnancy and childbirth to the daily, long-term efforts put into raising a child. Unlike other members of the animal kingdom, the human child needs help and assistance for a long number of years.
Writing way back in 1989, the Goan expat scholar Dr Stella Mascarenhas-Keyes focused on the ‘progressive motherhood’ role played by Goan women, especially in migration. Besides their reproductive and nurturing roles, Goan mothers have additional responsibilities—over the education of children. Many believe that “planning and sacrifices in the present were worthwhile to ensure future gains,” Mascarenhas concluded. In a way, this seems to have significantly influenced Goan society, especially the diasporic world and the areas shaped by it. Maybe this explains the high value given to education in Goa since long, and for this perhaps mothers haven’t been given sufficient credit.
Mother’s Day has been celebrated on diverse dates in different parts of the globe. It comes on differing days in Eastern Europe, the Arab world, Latin America, and other regions. Some of the celebrations have got commercialised, and one can understand the push that makes this happen. But this in no way reduces the role played by mothers.
In our times, the pressures on mothers have eased in some ways, but grown in many others. Technology might have made domestic work a bit easier, but the pressures to earn and meet growing expectations have taken their toll. Mothers now mostly have to play dual roles—as caregivers and breadwinners. They need to address their children’s education and ambitions. Mothers carry an emotional and mental load. Likewise, in our times, more so in places like Goa, mothers have become strong advocates in schools, for community leadership, and even on online platforms. It is possibly not a coincidence that among the younger generation of emerging activists in Goa, many are young mothers. They have a future to think of. Appreciating the mother does not mean a lack of appreciation for other members of the family. The father plays his own role, separate and unique. Youth and children do their bit too.
What’s especially appreciated in a mother’s role is her unwavering presence—the quiet strength with which she nurtures, comforts, and supports through every stage of life. Whether through small daily acts of care or deep emotional understanding, a mother often becomes the steady anchor in a child’s world, offering love that is patient, enduring, and unconditional. Let’s spare a thought for them, not only on the formal day dedicated to them but throughout the year.
